Playing With My Heart
by Bookman230
Summary: Kids, the first time your Aunt Robin and Uncle Barney said "I love you" was because of video games.


Kids, the first time your Aunt Robin and Uncle Barney said "I love you" was because of video games.

Well, not the_ first_ time. But the first time since they got back together and vowed to take it slow like every couple that hooks back up and inevitably ends up going pretty damn fast. Hell, Barney and Robin went above and beyond, considering how soon they married after hooking back up.

But I digress. We were at Barney's apartment. Lily and Marshall had to go home to take care of the baby, and Barney suggested I go along with him and Robin to play some games. Now kids, you know this. When Barney offers to let you watch a movie or play a game on his TV, you can't refuse. Because looking at that huge, perfect resolution TV is like staring into the face of God. It's a religious experience. I've seen the look on your faces when you visit Barney and Robin's house. You know what I'm talking about.

We decided to go with an old stalwart. Super Smash Brothers Brawl. I know Brawl sounds old to you kids, what with Super Smash Brothers Rumble Clash Battle Fight or whatever the hell the latest one is called, but back then Brawl was the_ bomb_. Anyway, Barney started it up and we quickly went with our favorites.

"Solid Snake," Barney dramatically stated. "The pinnacle of manliness, rivaled only by Captain Falcon. Packed to the brim with explosives, a rugged beard, manly voice. Even his name conveys manliness, if you know what I mean." He winked, and me and Robin rolled our eyes in solidarity.

"Samus Aran," Robin just as dramatically announced. "Female space bounty hunter. Badass armor, badass cannon, badass *kshh* helmet noises. Why be the badass of the present, when you can be the badass of the future?" She winked at the TV as if she was making a sales pitch. Samus Aran and Solid Snake are cool, kids, but we all know who's the real king of cool.

"Mario Mario." They groaned.

"Really, Ted?"

"Seriously?"

"A man!" I shouted, silencing them, "Who does not need to overcompensate with cannons or beards or a double entendre name. No, he's the most badass man of all. The working middle class man." They groaned again. "A simple plumber, yet his sheer determination and want to do good lets him overcome foes like a giant lizard. A metaphor, perhaps, of the difference the working man-made during World War 2 against the Japanese? Possibly. I-"

""Stop talking out of your ass, Ted," Barney interrupted. "He's a short, slightly overweight middle-aged man with an admittedly decent mustache."

"Next you're going to talk about how Superman is the best superhero."

"Actually-"

"Shut up and play!" they shouted in unison. Ah, well. They may not see the light, but we do, right kids? We're a righteous, moral house, who rejects heathens like Sonic or Batman. Right? Hey! Look at me! Come on! Superman spreads hope! Batman spreads fear, and hope always beats out fear in the end! It's- You know what, forget it. I'm just wasting my breath. Where was I? Ah, yes.

I think we chose Final Destination, and, as expected, Barney and Robin were as mature as Nintendo's intended age group.

"My Solid Snake sure is... explosive," Barney would drawl as he threw a grenade.

Or when Robin used Zero Suit Samus' whip. "Whipping Barney's Solid Snake. You feeling déjà vu too, Ted?"

"Sexual innuendo _plus_ Ted burn high-five!" Barney exclaimed, either ignoring or not realizing that the dig was at him too. But I, good friend that I was, took it with honor. Plus, me unsurprisingly whopping them with Mario helped with the pain.

"Feel the fiery passion of the working class!" I exclaimed triumphantly as I sent them flying with a Smash Attack.

"Seems like Ted's getting a big head," Robin said to Barney.

"Here I was thinking that wasn't possible. If it gets any bigger, it'll crush the Earth under its gargantuan weight," he solemnly responded.

"Right here, you know."

"For the good of the Earth, we must set aside our differences and stop this threat."

"For the good of the Earth." They nodded at each other. It dawned on me what they were doing.

"Come on guys, no, that's _cheap_!" But my protests went unheeded, as those fiends proceeded to team up on me like the dishonorable rogues they are. I fought valiantly, and gave them a good fight. But alas, I fell to the soldier and the bounty hunter. How eerily similar to how wars have the greatest toll on the working man. Truly, it's- fine fine, I'll hurry it up. Trust me, when you two are in college you'll be_ begging_ for my lectures and metaphors.

Long story short, I lost. Barney launched me up into the air with a rocket, at which point Robin jump kicked me off the stage, causing me to lose my final life. I took my loss with dignity, and anybody who says I threw my controller on the ground and shrilled, "You cheated!" is a dirty liar who is not to be trusted. Anyway, if I_ had_ said that, it fell on deaf ears, as the two stood up in celebration, cheering, hi fiving each other, etc. It was then that he said it.

"And_ that's_ why I love you!" Suddenly, we all fell silent. I could see the wheels in their brains turn. Barney was thinking of some way to back pedal. Robin was trying to think of someway to play off it. Me, no matter how much I wanted to help, it wasn't really my place.

Finally, after a few excruciatingly long seconds, Robin just shrugged. "I love you too." Barney's smile was like a puppy whose owner just came home from school. I guess after maneuvering around their feelings for all that time, Robin was just tired of it. Decided to just go for it. They smiled at each other for a moment. "But that's not going to keep me from kicking your ass!" she exclaimed, clenching her remote and focusing her attention back on the game, attacking Snake while he was off guard.

"Oooooh, you dastardly _fiend_!"

"Bounty hunters don't play fair, soldier."

And as they settled back into their banter, I just sat back and watched. Because honestly, those two are the most entertaining people around.


End file.
